Exactly 18 years ago, I was three months old. I had my whole life to do everything perfect, but choice by choice, whether it be good is bad, has gotten me to today. I can proudly say I've made bad decisions, but I've also made good ones. I know I will make more bad decisions, and that's a part of life. Everyone has to make decisions.
Last night, I made the decision to tell my ex that I was stupid for coming 1000 miles away from my home in thought that I could win him back. It was awkward, I started crying. I had to run to the bathroom to calm down. But something really good came out if it. We walked from a gas station to my hotel, just talking about his feeling and mine. I told him a big secret that I haven't told anyone and probably won't ever tell anyone again. But he helped me work through it, and now I can look at him as not my ex that I want back, but my best friend. My feelings for him weakened. I can now look at him without getting nervous, or getting butterflies in my stomach every time I hear his voice. I won't promise him or anyone it will stay this way, but right now, I can be myself around him. And that's all I've wanted for 2 years.
So all this to say, make the bad decisions, because sometimes, it might be the best thing you've ever done. It might turn out completely different than you expected.
Saturday, February 20, 2016
Decisions
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